We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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