Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
