brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
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