hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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