Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
