OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
