Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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