Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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