My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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