We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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