I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
