i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize