So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Randomize
