fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
