Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  My hand turned me down

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  (303): My hand turned me down http://tfl.nu/yueq
  Replies (5) Good night (462) Bad night (3002) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"

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  (317): she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES" http://tfl.nu/88gh
  Replies (46) Good night (3942) Bad night (1041) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee

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  (516): Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee http://tfl.nu/xpqv
  Replies (16) Good night (3108) Bad night (501) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.

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  (440): This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie. http://tfl.nu/kbq6
  Replies (6) Good night (873) Bad night (3100) Order T-Shirt
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"

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  (602): and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time" http://tfl.nu/r7we
  Replies (39) Good night (8303) Bad night (2976) Order T-Shirt
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  (949): View more from California

  I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.

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  (949): I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar. http://tfl.nu/limh
  Replies (8) Good night (4588) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK

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  (517): she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK http://tfl.nu/ybgq
  Replies (65) Good night (806) Bad night (8765) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.

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  (425): I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B. http://tfl.nu/2oen
  Replies (38) Good night (4946) Bad night (1880) Order T-Shirt
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.

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  (908): I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator. http://tfl.nu/xdgs
  Replies (4) Good night (1112) Bad night (2595) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.

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  (604): Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge. http://tfl.nu/yomn
  Replies (10) Good night (1691) Bad night (2191) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it

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  (847): If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it http://tfl.nu/cx6g
  Replies (6) Good night (2070) Bad night (560) Order T-Shirt
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  (818): View more from California

  The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.

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  (818): The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me. http://tfl.nu/w1nr
  Replies (18) Good night (5779) Bad night (407)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it

  (708): View more from Illinois

  So thats why that cop beat my ass?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Probably

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  (630): You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it (708): So thats why that cop beat my ass? (630): Probably http://tfl.nu/659z
  Replies (7) Good night (2109) Bad night (587)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?

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  (412): Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass? http://tfl.nu/n93b
  Replies (8) Good night (1038) Bad night (281) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots

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  (318): I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots http://tfl.nu/pvb5
  Replies (3) Good night (585) Bad night (247) Order T-Shirt

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