ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.