i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...