the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
