Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize