mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag