I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
