Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
oh god the rape fog is back!
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
