I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Randomize
