can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
