I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize