if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
