I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
