just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
