Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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