Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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