If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
