they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
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