I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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