I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
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