I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
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I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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