pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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