She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize