Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
