I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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