you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
