I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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