We need to start having sex underwater more often.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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