well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize