i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
