i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize