eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I think i got beer on your cat.
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