she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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