Please, let me fuck your mom
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
