Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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