none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Boobs speak an international language.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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