some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
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