they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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